I thought I'd give this whole blog world a go. Why not, I mean its not like I have a billion other things I could be doing wink wink. I'll give you fair warning though, I am not the best writer. And I have a habit of going off on tangents, so if I do that, please forgive me.
I am at the office today. I work here a couple of times a week and fill in for the main secretary. I also bring the baby with me which is becoming more of a challenge as he gets older and thus more active. I am sure I could ask my MIL to watch him, but there are like 24 other grandchildren that she babysits often, and I guess I just don't want to bug her. Even though I know she loves Harper, and would love doing it. After all, he looks a lot like his daddy, her baby.And I am thankful I get to bring him with me here. Not many mommies get to do this. Lance actually just came and picked him up on his way home to give me a couple hours here at that office without him. I have to admit, and I sort of feel silly about it, but the kid's only been gone a few minutes and I already miss him. I have not been without him at all, yet. The Relief Society President keeps bugging us to take him so we can have a date night, ( she wants another one) and we even went so far as to schedule a date, but I couldn't do it. Not yet! I of course lied and said something else came up. I feel bad. I'm almost ready though, I can feel it haha.
Which brings me to my next rant. I love being a mommy. It's quite possibly the most amazing thing I have ever done. I always had that feeling that motherhood would be special and it was always something I knew I wanted to do, but I had no idea just how cool it was till Lance put Harper in my arms. We had dealt with 3 miscarriages before the success of Harper, so you can imagine the worry we experiened throughout my pregnancy with him. I couldn't relax it seemed. There was always a new worry. I thought for sure those worries would be completly gone once he got here. But NOPE, they've only just begun. Silly me.
I have never written out my delivery story, and I always love to read other peoples child birthing experiences, so here I go: From the beginning...My mother flew into Washington from Oklahoma, 3 days before Harper was to come. I was so excited for her to get here. On my way to the airport my MIL called me and said to hurry back home after I picked my mom up, because there was supposed to be flooding. We'd never had this happen before and I didn't realize just how bad the situation was. My mom and I made it home, right before I-5 was to be shut down due to the water level rising above it! Had we been gone 30 minutes longer, we wouldn't have been able to get to our house. That night, helicopters shook our house every 15 mins or so, flying over head. Apparently, they were rescuing people from their homes and taking them to the local high school where they made shelter. Our area was one of the hardest hit, with many homes destroyed and flooded, and everything lost. Luckily, we took the flood zone into account when purchasing a home, and bought one on a hill. Yay for my husband! I was dang glad for that when all of this happened!! Jeez.
The whole flood situation was scary to us especially since I had preterm labor since I was 23 wks. I was switched from modified bed rest to full on bed rest and back again quite a few times. Starting at 29 wks, I had to go into the hospital 2x per week for NS T's ( non-stress tests) to monitor how the baby responded to all my contractions. I was also on a terrible terrible drug known as Terbutyline , a tocolytic, which was supposed to make contractions less, but in-turn made the child inside of me, move like a crack baby. I hated the stuff!! Luckily, I was allowed to stop the drugs at 36 wks. This pregnancy was not an easy one. My body's not a fan of the whole make and keep a baby safe process. By 40 wks, I was pretty used to the over 8 contractions an hour I was getting, and at my 39 wk check-up, I still hadn't dilated hardly at all. My uterus was just an irritable one.... They even thought I may have a uterine anomaly which would explain for the baby being breech, the multiple m/c, and all the pre-term labor I had. Turns out, after investigating my uterus after Harper came out, that's not the case. So, who knows what my body's deal is.
Out of the many complications I experienced during pregnancy, one frustrating one was the babe being in the frank breech position. US after US showed he stayed that way, too. Butt in pelvis with legs over head. Ouch! Poor baby. That meant that we had to do a c-section which I was not excited about. I tried everything to get that kid to flip so as to avoid that kind of surgery. I spent an hour at least everyday, usually during Oprah, on the carpet doing the "special flip" exercises. Didn't work though, and I was not going to do the whole Version attempt, where 2 doctors manually try to move the baby head down. There are too many risks involved with that procedure. Wasn't worth it to me. And there wasn't even a high percentage that it would work.
Dec. 4th was his EDD. I opted to wait the full 40 wks in case he decided to flip last minute. Our c-section was for 7 am on that day. The hospital called and said that since neither my doctor nor I could get to the hospital because of the flooding, they would do it for the 5th or 6th. The 5th came, the highway was still flooded. They said the 6th should be the day. I was so beyond ready at that point. We put our bags, pillows, snacks etc. by the door- in anticipation for the following day. My mom even painted my toenails and fingernails bright red for me. I was primped and pampered... ready to go!
I couldn't sleep that night, I was so scared and anxious to meet him already. I had a sinking feeling that for some reason, they would tell me to wait yet another day. They had told me the day before, to call that Dec 6th morning early, just to make sure it was a "yes" for sure. I got up, got ready, and called. The rooms were full they said, and there was an emergency c-section that took priority over mine, there was nothing they could do about it. I hung up and just sobbed there on the floor of my bedroom. My mom and husband were in the living room waiting for the verdict. I needed a few minutes to myself though. I couldn't believe after all I'd been through, this was happening. I thought, if only I opted to have him out the week earlier like they suggested....
Lance and I got back in bed since it WAS super early, and we weren't having him that day. I just laid there in bed and prayed... crying, as Lance held me. ---------We hear my cell phone ring!-------- We were only in bed for 20 mins. Lance had fallen back asleep. I had a feeling it was good news. It was the nurse saying my doctor wanted me to come in and see if Harper was still in the breech position. She said if he WAS, I'd get to have him that day, but if he wasn't, well they weren't inducing and I'd have to wait again! I had never before that day prayed so hard that he was, in fact, still breech. I knew he was though. I just knew it!! I screamed for joy so loud!!!! It was my day!
Now, if you thought this was a long enough birth story, I hate to say it gets longer. My doctor does the US, and like I thought, the babe was still breech. I change into the beautiful hospital gown and Lance puts on his scrubs. He's so excited to get to watch the surgery. The RN has her student nurse attempt the IV and of course she doesn't get it in. Luckily, she only got one shot. Then when the RN does it. she gets it in and pop! The IV comes out and I squirt blood everywhere! The look on there face told me that was NOT good. I was considered a "bleeder"... ya, whatever. It was the student nurse who made this happen. jk. I liked that girl (I had quite the nice...I mean, drugged conversation with her in recovery lol she was trying to convince me to choose her mom as Harpers new Ped). The anesthesiologist came in to chat with us. Basically, he ordered another test that officially labeled me a "bleeder". He told me he could not do a spinal on me because of the risk of a Spinal Hematoma. They had to do a General, and knock me out. Also, sadly, Lance wasn't allowed to come in OR anymore, because of the chance that complications might arrise. It was then I was considered an emergency c-section. The poor guy was so bummed. So was I, for him, but I honestly just wanted to meet Harper, I didn't really care how he got to me any longer, just as long as he was safe.
Apparently, my boy came out screaming so loud, Lance knew immediately when they pulled him out of me. He scored 9/9 on the APGARS which was good for a c-section baby. They wheeled Harper out to meet Lance 15 mins later. He was able to be with him from that moment on to hold, bathe and feed. The kid came out starving Lance said, so since I was in recovery they had to give him 2 ounces of formula from a little cup in order for him to stop crying. I met him almost 4 hrs later after I was considered okay. Man! I was so drugged. I guess, that day I talked to all my friends and family on the phone and I don't remember ONE conversation. Not one!
When I think back to that day, I so wish I could re-live that moment of finally meeting Harper over and over. I can see through pictures, but its just not the same. Lance was so caught up in it all, he forgot to film us. It was the most amazing---words cannot describe how amazing it was! My mom said when I was wheeled in the room, I was looking everywhere, my eyes darting every which way, trying to see where Harper was. Lance had him. I cried and cried and cried when he handed him to me. I felt such an overwhelming flow of love and emotion come through me. He was a pro nurser right from the beginning. He quieted right away too. He knew my voice.
My love grows even stronger for this little 'chunky monkey' every day. After such a long hard road of dealing with 3 miscarriages and then a rough pregnancy as well as labor... to finally have this perfect being in my life, is a miracle and blessing. And that is FINALLY the end! I promise that the rest of my blogs won't be this long
